Art, theater, and a politically driven upbringing in the Mission District were the fundamental markers that fueled Alma Herrera-Pazmiño’s passion for storytelling.
“My whole educational career after school was really foundational to how I see the world through art,” Pazmiño told El Tecolote.
As a child, Pazmiño frequently participated in local productions and community programs like Loco Bloco — a program that incorporates Afro-Latinx traditions to engage San Francisco youth through music, dance, and theater. It was there that she began to participate in the “Theater of the Oppressed.”
“I remember there was a play called ‘Burning American Dreams’ and [it] was about my neighbors across the street, who were being evicted,” Pazmiño said. “I learned what Ellis Act Evictions were when I was in fifth grade … It was the first time I saw myself reflected in a play and the following year — I was cast in it.”
Her involvement in these influential spaces paved the way for her career as a filmmaker. Pazmiño is currently featured on the Cine+Más Latino Film Festival lineup for a short 12-minute film she wrote, produced and directed titled “#LaGaybie”.
Cine+Más SF is a non-profit organization in its 15th year of showcasing emerging and established creators from the United States, Latin America, Spain and Portugal. Cine+Más SF has year-round programming and special events that seek to amplify Latinx communities through visual, performance, and literary arts.
“#LaGaybie” is a coming-of-age story depicting the journey of Simona, a young LGBTQ+ individual navigating familial and societal expectations on identity. The film begins with the protagonist, Simona, filling out a questionnaire given to her by her cousin, Raquel, who is also queer, titled “What kind of Queer are you?”
“I wrote this short film and it [is] based on a few things … the coming out experience, and what I was learning through my friend’s experiences, growing up in really catholic homes and being queer,” Pazmiño said. “The other piece was really around these … heteronormative boxes that my queer community also places within ourselves — [a] kind of gender performance you have to play based on who you are [or] who you are dating.”
‘Femme,’ ‘Lipstick Lesbian,’ ‘Flirt,’ and ‘Gold Star’ were words displayed in bold red in the following scene, all terms that can be considered controversial as they may be used to pigeonhole queer people.
“[The] idea that two studs or two butch people can’t be together because one has to be the more feminine one, and one has to be the more masculine one,” Pazmiño told El Tecolote. “Those were conversations me and my partner, at that time, were having because people were telling us ‘you should be more like this,’ so it was a lot of interpersonal dynamics that were very nuanced.”
The nuances Pazmiño references are often — not only — pressured by society but forced upon by the queer community. Pazmiño includes scenes of Simona’s cousin putting makeup on her and dressing her in a way that conforms to a specific ‘identity,’ which highlights the pressure on queerness adhering to socially, digestible identities. “I was trying to play around with the idea … a day in the life of what it feels like to not want to accept that you are [or have to be] something,” Pazmiño said.
The film also addresses the relationship between Simona and her seemingly catholic mother, who is introduced, praying with a rosary and holding a torn piece of the “What Kind of Queer are you?” questionnaire. Throughout the film, there are scenes that emphasize the internal struggle between Simona and her mother, as Simona wants to mend the relationship but not apologize for who she is.
“I also wanted to really think about space and how sometimes there’s places where we feel really isolated and small, and there’s other places where we feel bigger,” said Pazmiño. “There are two locations in the film that represent that smallness, and then that openness.” She mentions two locations where the protagonist is shot, her home surrounded by Catholic memorabilia and the beach with Simona sitting on the sand, conveying a sense of peace.
#LaGaybie, also incorporates subtle traces of the Salvadoran culture because, as a child, Pazmiño believed that she was Salvadoran as most of what surrounded her, were the traditions and culture of the Salvadoran community. “It wasn’t until I was 6 that my mom corrected me, with kindness, and was like ‘No, you’re Ecuadorian,’” Pazmiño said. “A lot of the community that I grew up with was Salvadoran, I grew up with those traditions. So I definitely have a deep respect and love for the [Salvadoran] community.”
Pazmiño spoke to El Tecolote about her choice to highlight the protagonist’s Salvadoran culture throughout the film. “You see echoes of that piece of her identity throughout her room, I wanted to make sure that was clear — I was hoping that this could also share pieces of love with the [Salvadoran] community. Like the little moments of language, the text messages, I was hoping for that to be a shout-out.”
In the last portion of the film, Simona goes to her local panaderia, La Reyna Bakery, to pick up some bread for her mother. “I wanted there to be a break from her depression and to offer some perspective to her life, there’s a life outside of the family,” Pazmiño said. “The connection for me was the bread. One of my fondest memories is either after church, or on the weekends going to get pan dulce with my family, that just would bring me joy.”
The symbolism behind Simona picking up pan dulce was included to imply this concept of ‘breaking bread’ and the unifying of two people, these two people being Simona and her mother. “If my mom and I weren’t talking, weren’t sharing bread, that bread would actually be a glue, a silent glue. I think that bread, especially pan dulce, is the symbol of communion, whether it’s with a family, a loved one, or with your neighbors.”
#LaGaybie ends with a kind gesture from a stranger. While Simona is picking up pan dulce, this stranger pays for Simona’s bread and leaves her with a smile and a phone number. It concludes with a sense of acceptance, even from a stranger.
#LaGaybie examines these heteronormative labels that can often be exclusionary and allow individuals to choose who they are or want to be. Identities that are not based on fear of rejection. “It’s okay to accept yourself, even if others don’t, you’re still loved regardless. I really hope [‘#LaGaybie’] offers someone hope.”
#LaGaybie was featured at the Roxie Theater in San Francisco on Sept. 30 as part of the Cine+Más Latino Film Festival. To learn more about Alma Herrera-Pazmiño and her work please visit her website: aherrerapazmino.myportfolio.com.
We encourage you to support Cine+Más, which runs until Oct. 15, and the other talented creators being showcased this year, please visit: cinemassf.org.