[su_label type=”info”]The Devil’s Advocate[/su_label]
[su_pullquote align=”right”]“We need to see the world and act in it!” —Judy Brady, activist[/su_pullquote]
There are some characters in our midst that, when we see them coming towards us, we might decide to cross the street rather than risk running into them. Something in their countenance seems to tell us to stay away, or to approach them at our own risk. So, we generally cross the street.
We either love or dread these characters and, generally speaking, we end up avoiding them. When we make that rather defensive move, we might miss the chance of ever really knowing what moves those people with the furrowed brows. Many among them are amazing individuals. Besides, they might educate us on the reasons why they seem so antagonistic and we might become allies in common struggles.
Judy Brady was that kind of a person. At her memorial a couple of weeks ago, everyone who spoke about her spoke with love, but also mentioned her seemingly uninviting looks, with that left eyebrow always raised in a stern perusal of our potential worthiness. Judy, to her credit, did not suffer fools gladly.
That is a characteristic of people who like “to tell it as they see it,” people who speak truthfully. They will talk truth to friends, to relatives and, of course, to adversaries.
“What’s been missing is the truth!,” Judy used to say.
Her daughters said their mother “was irascible, but full of life and humor. She had a passion for justice, a passion for life.”
Judy Brady was a clear example of an activist who spoke truth to power throughout her life, which she spent an important part of in the Mission, in her Harrison house, between 24th and 25th streets.
I met Judy about three years ago, late in her amazing activist life. She was already wheelchair-dependent, described as “a warrior riding on her chariot” by Ron Chism, a supervisor at Garfield Pool and the beloved instructor of the Water Aerobics class. He also spoke at her memorial.
Her friend and activist collaborator Sandra Steingrabber, who also spoke, listed an impressive list of struggles and accomplishments in which Judy participated. It is to Sandra that this article owes its title, “My crabby Angel.” She was referring to Judy.
Among Judy’s life work, she wrote a well-known article for the inaugural issue of Ms. Magazine (1972), titled “Why I want a Wife.”
The article has been reprinted and shared many times and is essential reading in Women’s Studies courses. A funny and incisive document, it surprised the readers, because it was a woman who asked for a wife. The original article was written decades before gay marriage was taken seriously. From the title, at that time it was generally assumed that it was only one person who could have a wife: a privileged male husband. The article lists many advantages provided by a wife and it ends by asking, “Who wouldn’t want a wife?”
Besides her writing, Judy was an active fighter in the struggle to legalize abortion and she took part in labor strikes, did anti-racism work, as well as being an important part of the breast cancer movement. In the international realm, she was a tireless activist in the liberation movements in Latin America, particularly for Nicaragua and Cuba.
As she got older, she also fought for the rights of disabled people. She once even participated in a prolonged occupation of a federal building, which helped in the eventual passing of the Americans with Disabilities Act. After that victory, she would proudly say, “Whenever I go down a curb cut with my scooter, I think about that picket line—and it makes me smile.”
Before I could call her a friend, I had to break down the barrier of that serious face and her rather uninviting responses when I tried to engage her in conversation.
We were participants in the Senior Water Aerobics class at Garfield Pool. I knew that she could smile, because I had seen her smile before, at a distance (maybe when she was going down a curb with her scooter?) but she had never smiled towards me…and that was a challenge. I can honestly say that one of my proudest moments is when she finally regaled me with one of her smiles!
Eventually, we became friends. She came to a couple of my theater productions and we also coincided in some demonstrations, especially against gentrification.
Of course, she also antagonized the Google buses! To block one of those buses with her wheelchair was one of her favorite actions!
As I wrote before, during the memorial, everyone mentioned Judy’s stern attitude. We all had a good laugh about it. We were not alone! She had been the same with everyone and maybe we all felt happy to have become accepted into her circle of friends and allies. Even her daughters said that sometimes, trying to earn trust with their mom “was like rubbing the belly of an alligator!” but we who knew her can say that it was worth the risk.
I finish this remembrance with a quote from Judy Brady: “I was born angry and I didn’t know it. I learned I was angry 40 years ago… and I’m going to leave this world angry, because we have messed up something so incredibly beautiful!”
We should all be so happy to have a crabby angel like Judy in our lives!